On Unfriendly People

 

Hebrews 12: 14 

"Follow peace with all men, and holiness, without which no man shall see the Lord:"  

At the thought of 'unfriendly people', the first set of image that comes to mind are usually people who are hostile to you, don't like a thing or two about you, can't stand you or just don't relate at all with others in a friendly manner. However, this goes beyond the surface to include those who do not necessarily share the same belief or values system with you; those with the same belief but varied opinion, those who pretend to be friends with you but plot against you, or those who are out-rightly without (col 4:5) and persecute you...etc. The list goes on : all [kinds of] men; and the opening scripture said to follow peace with them all! 

This a rather disturbing instruction, as it could be a bit tasking to constantly keep up peace with someone who clearly do not want peace with you. But here is why it is important: reading down the full verses from 14-16, it said to follow peace [carefully] with all men...and holiness...lest any...fail out of the grace of God; lest the root of bitterness...trouble you...lest there be any fornicator, or profane person...who...sold his birthright. That means the instruction is primarily written to you [and not for them], in order to keep you from falling from grace, into bitterness, fornication and profanity.

Looking at it from a deeper dimension, it makes sense because being at 'war' (instead of following peace) with someone puts you in an unavoidable position that breeds anger, hate, grudge, and bitterness in you, which in turn makes you say things you shouldn't have said...which if not careful may be profane. None of these evil traits are healthy and favorable because Job 5 : 2 states that wrath kills..and envy slays; bitterness on its own, spreads like cancer and defiles according to vs 15 of Heb 12; and profanity is a sin that can wipe out a whole generation from the face of the earth, just like Edom (Esau). Also it brings you down to the level of those same people who do not want peace with you, as there is confusion and every evil work wherever there is strife (James 3: 16) thereby questioning your faith and integrity.

On the flip side, the wicked does not go free of the restlessness he caused you. God deliberately asked you to follow peace with them because he wants to recompense the wicked by himself for your sake, and he knows how well to do that satisfactorily. Romans 12:19 said to avenge not yourselves, but rather give place to [God's] wrath, because vengeance is his, and he repays; and Colossians 4:5 encourages to walk in wisdom with them that are without..,a wisdom which is easily entreated...and full of mercy (James 3:17).

Also, Paul said in 1 Tim 4:10 that the reason why we labor and suffer [allow] reproach is because we trust in the living God who saves...ESPECIALLY THOSE THAT BELIEVE. So, there is a special attention to those his own people, how much more when he wants to take revenge for them. Also living at peace with unfriendly people speaks well of you and gives you a good reputation before even those who do not share your faith with you (1 Tim 3:7), and makes you perfected example of a believer in word, in conversation, in charity, in spirit, in faith, in purity ( 1 Tim 4:12).  

So, the right response to unfriendliness or hostility is to walk in wisdom and peace, because it puts in a good light, secures the purity of your heart and saves you the energy of getting revenge for yourself knowing that there is someone who can get that for you. May you find a renewed grace to practice peace the more with everyone. 

God bless you!