On Contention

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James 3:16 

"For where envying and strife is, there is confusion and every evil work."   

At one point or the other in life, there is this need for you to make your voice heard and your opinion taken into consideration. That is quite fine; however, taking it to extreme, especially when it involves insisting on yours against another's opinion or voice, is where contention comes in. 

This insistence on a view point when the other person won't back down either, brings about strife, and James 3:16 says that wherever this exists, there is confusion and every evil work. Now, this is so true of the world we live in, because you notice that whenever you have an argument with someone over a matter, you feel disoriented, annoyed or any other negative emotion you can relate with, especially when the motive is to win without considering whether the self-esteem of the other person is being trampled on. That is usually not a good sight as it leaves both parties with a scar to deal with. 

Solomon explained in proverbs 13:10 that it is only by pride that contention comes : but with the well advised is wisdom. This show that the reluctance of letting your guards or ego down is what could keep you from letting go, but if you are wise, you would choose to act in wisdom. 

James 1:19 says that this wisdom is in being swift to listen, slow to speak and slow to wrath. So this is to say that if you are willing to listen more to the other person's viewpoint, understand the angle he/she is coming from, it would give you better clarity on the issue, guide you in processing your thoughts well, and structure your response in a non-contentious manner. In that way, it would become more like a conversation than an argument; because every form of anger is eliminated and you and your counterpart still got your points passed across each other. Now, that is wisdom! 

So, the best way to keep contention at bay is to genuinely listen to what the other person has to say, even when their ideas seem not to be co-relating with yours. This helps  you to avoid all other forms of associating evil works and negative emotions; and also maintain healthy relationships with others (see related post here). May you receive a renewed vigor as you enhance your communication skill with this wisdom. Amen. 

God bless you!



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